The Bible

We won! I’d like to begin by congratulating our team for our comprehensive 26-6 victory over Kogarah High School. Well I’m happy to say that my Lebanese-inflicted scratches, cuts and bruises have finally healed. It was dirty game and I’m glad to say I stayed out of trouble. Apparently some mullet-headed Lebanese youth threw a punch at the back of my head to add to all my other injuries but my adrenalin was pumping and I’m glad I didn’t feel it for his sake. I made a few nice runs down the sideline and set up a try with a rather unorthodox basketball pass that Niksa taught me in amongst his never-ending payouts of Abid. On the whole though, my game was pretty ordinary, just as this blog will be.

My back is dead-set screwed right now. I’ve been going on regular night walks with my mum to soothe it yet it doesn’t seem to be improving at all. I have brought this problem on myself by typing my Modern History notes in front of the computer for a few days straight. Heath and his hierarchical classes…

I’m also turning 17 on the 25th of April, which is Anzac Day. The family tradition involves going down to Aussie Stadium to see the Dragons take on the Roosters in the annual Anzac Day match. This year Shep and Abid are coming along, so I’m extra pumped. I’m losing sleep over it and for the first time in years I have no confidence whatsoever in St George. They have been playing like retards and I want them to show some pride in the jumper. I don’t care if it’s with tackles, headhunters or any other sort of violence I just want to see them ‘rip in’ better than they have all year. I’m predicting the Roosters are going to have a ‘massive dig’ and it should be a nice physical game.

Well here comes the twist. I’ve done some thinking and realised that I am at the crossroads of my life. I have academic, family and relationship issues which are going to come up. I need to work at what I want and try to make my goals, ambitions and hopes reality. My future is uncertain and I’m shit scared about what is in store for me. I have mixed feelings and I’m going to go hard for everything from now on.

Basically, what I’m trying to say is I don’t want to blog anymore. My heart isn’t in it. I’m a champion writer and I have nothing to prove.  

 I’m sad to finish in this sorry state, but not everyone gets to go out on a good note. Look at Joey Johns as a prime example. Maybe one day I’ll boot up the computer and think ‘fuck it, I want to blog’. The best-case scenario is that I will go into hibernation for a long time before tentatively dipping my toes back into the water. But I seriously believe this is the end. I have revaluated everything and I want to make the most of all my opportunities and go hard. If I fail, at least I tried.

Throughout ‘The Bible’ I have tried to be as colourful and entertaining as I am in real life. What is the point of life if there are no characters or fun? That is my firm belief and it has been reflected thoroughly in this blog. I’m sorry for stopping this forum of entertainment, I’ll never delete it because of the wonderful memories but it is just not important to me anymore. I don’t give a shit and there is no point in doing it if my work is sub-standard. Therefore, it is all over unfortunately.

If I have made those boring ‘sick days’ where you take the day off school to sit in front of the computer and have a nice wank (or whatever girls do on their sick days) a little more interesting, than I have fulfilled my aim. It was also exciting for me when I was writing, a good release valve. That is also over now, and I hope I provided you all with some amusement and good times in cyberspace. A big thanks to all the guys and girls that commented, you made me try my hardest to write well.

On a last note, I’d like to wish all my mates at Tech and Shipley good luck with the HSC. I’d like to wish Karima all the best with her driving, feel free to ask Dimo for some free and informative advice on ‘drifting techniques’. I’m going to win the race to P’s girly. I’d also like to wish Elena a safe and enjoyable trip overseas, have fun. If I’ve forgotten anyone I’m sorry.

I quit. That is all I have to say.

Yours faithfully,

John Vallis

 

Good morning ladies and gentleman. Today, somewhat surprisingly, ‘The Bible’ will not act as an avenue for self-promotion.  Rather, it will be an outlet for something that I have been meaning to blog on for a while. Read on and enjoy the fruits of my work!

According to Wikipedia 'Cool' is the planned fourth single off pop star Gwen Stefani's multi-platinum album 'Love'. The reputable Urban Dictionary also defines the word 'cool' as a word used to refer to something that is  'fashionable and attractive'.  Ladies and gentleman, this is a word I believe was invented for the mere purpose of describing the exquisite Karima Mckimmie and the equally lovely Elena Mitrovski. When someone is ‘cool’ they are popular, suave and you like them. This is certainly true in terms of my feelings towards these two fabulous girls.

What the hell? Have I finally resorted to smoking the dreaded marijuana you ask? The simple answer is no. I have merely been reacquainted with these two wonderful young ladies after a long time. Some magical wizardry worthy of Dumbledore has made us all friends again, and I’m pumped for what lies in store. I’m writing this mainly to show my affection for the two of them and illustrate to you all that the past is indeed the past.

Firstly, what can I say about the son of a gun also known as Karima. The first thing that comes to mind is her generosity. She has a well-known affection for chocolate which was evidenced when she bought a few of the brown bars off me in the good old days. She’s such a charitable girl I didn’t even have to ask her to dig into some of the sweet stuff. She simply ripped in with no fear of a decrease in the weight of her purse or an increase in the size of her figure. Excellent stuff! Despite her Willy Wonka-like affinity for sweets, she still manages to fit nicely into some pretty hot pants. I used to call them ‘inappropriate for school’ but basically they improved the taste of the Gloria Jean’s mango smoothies by about ten-fold. Let me just say that Ian Thorpe changes his hairstyle/ hair colour every few weeks and he is the biggest faggot of a man in history. Karima on the other hand, uses dye with aplomb to create a ‘smooth silky shine’ just like that gay hairdresser Joh Bailey promotes on those advertisements. Her hair is superbly eye-catching no matter what colour she decides to apply. Variety is the spice of life I say! The girl also loves a joke with everyone around her and is quite fun-loving. This is typified by her tickling capabilities back in the past when she almost broke my ribs on several occasions. However, whenever I lifted my game she couldn’t handle the heat in the kitchen and proved to be more ticklish than Humphrey B Bear. I’m also impressed by her ability to trust others. This did not work to her advantage in the past when I told her I was playing ‘Snake’ (record score 1200) on her mobile when in fact I was scanning through her messages. Karima also has a pretty friendly smile, the type to make you want to smile back equally warmly .She is chatty and heaps easy to talk to, and I respect that. Overall, she’s a pretty mad chick and I’m glad we are on good terms once more so we can continue our friendship for a long time!

Now onto Elena. Basically her best attribute in my opinion is of course her laugh. I can’t explain it properly but it’s heaps cute and is exactly how a chick should laugh. I noticed it straight away and I just thought I’d mention it because it helps dissipate the memories of Abid’s ‘earthquakes’/ Josip’s ‘random noises’ from my nightmares. Another of her best qualities is her intelligence. Hearing her talk is the complete opposite to what you hear whilst waiting for your burger outside Hurstville Hungry Jacks on a school day.  She is very sophisticated and her ideas are usually thought provoking. She is never boring and this is another excellent aspect of her personality. I knew I couldn’t avoid this so here goes. She dead-set has the best legs I’ve seen on a girl in living memory. They a like a perfect cross between Lance Armstrong ‘steroid legs’ and a catwalk model’s pogo sticks. I love that shit, they are so good they are most probably in the same league as my own ‘bazookas’. Elena also has the best fashion sense. She wears the right clothes all the time, looking superb on nearly every occasion. The girl is also heaps modest in regards to rating herself and she has hair in the same league as Karima’s. She has also told me in the past she wants ‘a tan’ but I reckon she is pretty cute just as she is. She is a completely superior girl to what she thinks she is. She is the best chick and I like her more than Cyclops likes Jean Gray (X Men all the way). Anyways once again, I’m happy to have made up with her and I’m hopeful we can become good friends once more.

Our old group always had fun times whenever we went out. One of the highlights included going to Cronulla in sub-zero temperatures for a swim. I thought we’d all catch hypothermia especially when I started to go purple. I took one for the team on that occasion, but it was still a memorable day. We then pumped it over to Hurstville to watch some Jessica Simpson movie which Elena recommended. It was dead-set appalling and I still rue wasting that 10-dollar note which I could have put to such great use at the moment. Our group had all these in-jokes and funny moments like ‘pass the confectionary’, and one of the best things that I remember was Karima and I battling it out in a moisturiser fight. She randomly shoved some olay serum right into the depths of my ear so I proceeded to redecorate her face with the stuff. I ended up winning fair and square! I also remember everyone promoting other themselves by signing each others hands with stuff like ‘so and so is the coolest ever’.  It’s a little lame in retrospect but Friday arvos were the best, simple as that.

In conclusion, I’m glad that I am on good terms with my girls once again. The past was fun and enjoyable, but I’m sure we can all be even closer and better friends in the future. I’m certain we are going to go out these holidays and add heaps more to the great memories of the past. Love ya girls! ;)

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Well I'm happy that exam week is over. I think I did well in most exams, however, I suspect I may have fucked a few up as well. Everyone who has visited this forum knows the deal: I talk myself up, I talk about events in my life, I talk about my friends/ex-friends and then I talk myself up some more. Apologies to Sarah Shipley for delaying this blog for so long.

 

This exam week has made me realise my own limitations. I'm not the greatest academic, in fact, I only have two major weapons which I can use to my advantage. I have an outstanding memory and I'm an excellent writer. Those are the only things that help me very much. If I had a choice of getting 100 UAI or playing first grade for St George I think I'd definitely rather live out my boyhood dream. I'm quite tired right now, ah well. Nothing a bout of cruising with Dimo '180 kilometres + a drift' Davidov won't fix. Sylvester Stallone said 'the body is a medium through which to express the brain'. I might have a ripped physique, but sadly I am currently not sure about my brain capacity as I'm not sure if my efforts will be reflected in my results in regards to this exam week :-(

 

Oh, I wrote this mad story for Extension English. It is probably the greatest thing I have ever written in my life. Melvin said it was a 'pleasure to read'. He probably also said he regularly sucks gay men off but that may have happened in my imagination. A good old reference to a Melvin 'midfield bomb' may have been thrown in there for good measure. Anyway I wrote this story and I produced it in the exam so I am expecting to rip it. I want to show this story to James Diment and see what he makes of it. Far, that kid is smart. Mensa standard for sure. Shipley also seems pretty good at English so perhaps she could read it :-)

 

I also got robbed in Modern History which I've only just reflected on this afternoon. I deserved full marks and I only got 19 out of 20. My speech was the best in the class, even Niksa admitted it was better than his. I spoke for 26 minutes looking at my palm cards about five times in the whole speech. I'm incensed that I didn't get full marks when I put my heart and soul into it. I wanted the reward and it didn't come. Ah well, fuck it.

 

What else has been happening? Well, Elena called my blog gay via MSN. An interesting observation considering I'm the self proclaimed second best blogger in history. My content is outstanding, and my manner is even better. I can say whatever I want and no-one can do anything about it.

 

My mood is slightly positive because St George beat the Gold Coast last week. If there was no NRL I don't know what I would do with my time. Hopefully the Dragons can back it up this week against a Johns-less Knights, however our cause will not be aided by the absence of my hero Mark Gasnier who is out for the season with a pectoral injury (sorry if this blog is sounding negative). Man I'm so pissed he is out!

 

Another good thing is the touch team is going well (three wins, one loss). Unsurprisingly, I've scored seven tries in three appearances and we have only lost once when I was not there. I am proposing the following: WHEN we make the grand final, I will run my myself into the ground before we lose. We will win the grand final and bathe in glory before we leave the school.

 

Also on a sporting note, we played Caringbah in rugby league at the mighty Scarborough Park. We lost 10-18, yet I reckon everyone played really well. Especially good were Shep, Benguin, Geordie, Petro and Chalouhi. Abid was also very good in the first half. In the second half he looked like one of those camels that transports the Egyptians around the Sahara Desert all day (minus the fat in the humps that provides them with water). Personally, I scored our only meaningful try and I was pretty strong in defence too. Good game boys, hopefully we can 'rip in' in the Arrive Alive Cup and win.

 

I've been rather pre-occupied with thoughts of cruising of late. It generally involves revving around the streets of Brighton etc at high speeds with little purpose and loud music.  Last time was quite interesting, particularly when I barged into the restaurant at Mortdale to see Karima and Elena.  I know people such as Shep want to hear what happened so I'll recount this particular incident.

 

We were walking past the shopfronts of Mortdale aimlessly yet I was actually looking out for the chicks. They were paying me out on MSN when I told them I was coming to Mortdale that night. They obviously thought I was joking. Little did they know that they were completely firing me up whilst I was sitting at the keyboard. Moni told me they were going to a restaurant so I took this into account as I was getting ready to leave. I quickly did some push ups to lift my 'mental game' further, and then I set off to Josip's place with Shep so we could go cruising.

 

We headed off to Mortdale in the cars getting lost several times on the way. I started looking in all the shops and I happened to see them enjoying dinner. So I quickly asked Shep if I should go in. He half-heartedly told me to, not expecting me to act. Little did he know that Dimo's base had completely fired me up, and the high speeds we had travelled at had made me fearless. In my cruising singlet which showed off my unbelievably perfect arms, I swung open the glass door and walked in. Everyone was staring at me as I barged in, yet the girls didn't notice me.  I walked through and I gave a waiter a bit of a 'what?' when he looked at me strangely. Apparently I was walking all hardcore and 'gangsta' but I didn’t notice. I was like two metres from their table and they still hadn't noticed me despite my numerous 'yo's' (it was pretty loud). Then I heard an 'oh my god' as Elena noticed me. I asked them if they wanted to come in the cars, and I got no response. Then out of nothing Karima started making for the toilets. For some reason I started to walk after her. They were all panicky and worked up regarding my presence. Elena told me to stop following Karima and asked why I had come. I remember I was smirking and I said something along the lines of 'I don't talk shit'. Anways, thats all I really remember. But it is easy to talk shit on the internet, back it up in real life. Don't go walking off like a pea heart, that is embarassing.

 

This is random, but I've decided I'm not going to Schoolies. I'm a clean living kid: no smoking, drinking or taking drugs. So the general idea of schoolies is not appealing to me. I don't want to fight randoms (I already have participated in a street fight) and I don't desire casual sex with people I don't even know so there is no point in me going to Queensland or anywhere else for that matter. I'm concerned for the guys who do go though, as teenagers are being exposed to more and more dangers than ever. Try and stay off that shit. Look at me, I don't do any of that shit at all and I'm going ok in life. Of course I'm going to get on the piss after school but I'm not going to overdo it to the point where it jeopardises my safety. The only somewhat 'corrupt' activity I participate in is the occasional *cough* 'pull' every couple of days. It's all about choice and you need to know your limits and control yourself unlike Ben Cousins. Ah well, it's all good as long as you know what your doing :-)

 

What am I doing tomorrow? Well, I'm home alone so I'll probably just go on the computer all day and intermix my activities by shooting hoops outside whilst the porn is downloading. At least I am honest. I'll have the music going and just chill out for the day. If anyone wants to do anything call.

 

And then at night........... CRUISING! PUMP UP!

 

Ps I'm going to update after the dance regarding Friday night and how I found the last ever dance I will attend :-(

 

SO COMMENT ON MY BLOG! ANY COMMENT IS APPRECIATED! :-)

'Life is either a daring adventure or nothing' Helen Keller

 

Don't take shit for granted and remember to have a crack at everything!

 

John Vallis is going to bed...

 

 

 

I love the blunt nature of 'The Bible'. This is a sporadic blog so I need to be quick. I am leaving for the Gold Coast tomorrow so if anyone wants to contact me you know my digits.  I'm going for five days to rest and rebuild for the New Year. Now to be honest, 2006 was probably the best year of my life. I say this because it just flowed beautifully and worked out almost exactly as I wanted it. It also followed on from 2005, which should burn in hell. In this unfortunate year I managed to achieve average school certificate results, break my collarbone running up the sideline against North Ryde, fuck up my formal and destroy all my meaningful friendships. Damn, I was on a good streak back then wasn't I? To say I hated 2005 with a passion would be a complete understatement. So to move on and begin afresh I need to quickly profile 2006.

 

 

- I competed at the school swimming carnival in all strokes as usual, achieving runner up age champion behind Marcus Low. It was in the final event, the house relay, that my favourite school moment took place. As House Captain, I had to organise the mighty Gotto relay team so we could have a shot at one last hooray before the day ended. I remember the order clearly.... year 7 kid, Rick Trinh, my brother, Simon Wynn, John Vu and then me. After some heroic swimming from our troops it was up to me. Vu touched the wall and we were fourth. I dived in to the roars of the Wangs and Yangs in my house and instantly started powering through the water. I breathed three times in the whole race and when I touched the wall I was gasping for air and couldn't breath at all. I looked up and someone threw a block of wood into the water saying '2'. As I was helped out of the water I was mobbed by a few asians and my team,ates. The worst house in the whole school had somehow gone well for the first time after our pathetic efforts in the other team events. Being congratulated by asians isn't that bad after all. I still stand by my belief that I am 'the best swimmer ever to emerge from the Greek Islands'. LOL. It was even better that it was at my homeground of Bexley.

 

- The Under 16's Boys relay team consisted of Marcus Low, Michael Antonelli, Shane Drinkwater and myself. We easily won the zone and suprisingly beat a few buff kids from Caringbah at the regional carnival to come first. We were a hot team even though we had more fun swimming in the rapids like five year olds instead of focusing on the race at hand. We usually prepared by tackling the little kids around the legs in the little pool. Nonetheless, we progressed to the CHS carnival. Michael and I took a train there, almost missing our race entirely. There were kids there from weird places like Wagga Wagga and Barenjoey, and they all looked pretty built. We ripped in and despite my goggles coming off we came second in our heat. We then waited for about six hours where we went to check out the Easter Show just down the road from Homebush Pools. The final came around and I am proud to say we came seventh in the state, a pretty good performance considering we came tenth when we used to be little cuties in year seven. We got team of the week and when we got called up on stage my pants were too high apparently. Ah well.

 

- Substitute Raymond Sedrak for Michale Antonelli and you also have the champion Under 16's Cross Country team. I came eighth at zone (unfit/shitcunt) and sixteenth at regional. Anyways we progressed to CHS as a team yet again. It was at Eastern Creek Raceway and my mum had to drive me heaps early in the morning. Basically, the course was like a mudbath and it was pouring down rain. After my effort at region I was fucked. The hills were hard and I felt heavier than Abid as I trudged through ankle deep squelch. I tripped over and landed on my stomach two times and was shit tired by the end of it. Still, it was good eye opener to race against some aspiring professional long distance runners. Despite my high levels of fitness it was an uphill battle against these midgets who could just run and run for yonks. Nevertheless, I'm happy because I tried my best and got a nice singlet. Good times.

 

- Going to Shep's house and watching Anthony Mundine pound Danny Green. Especially intriguing was seeing all Shep's used tissues in the bin. Clean them up man!  It was really good fun, I learnt how to play poker :-)

 

- Camp. Josip, if you want coke you know what you have to do! LOL! NEVER MENTION THIS CAMP EVER AGAIN! Pumping Ipods and played Nintendo 64 also took up a fair bit of time. I also remember was Abid's beautiful right hand to the gut that severely winded me. Most people would have gone down, but I am a tough son of a bitch who never gives up :-)

 

- Going to Abid's house to watch Origin III. There was something special about this night and it wasn't the softcore porn that I immersed myself in for the couple of hours before the game. I think it had something to do with Darren Lockyer's man of the match performance. Playing pool afterwards was also quite good :-)

 

- Our Modern History class. Unforgettable moments include the regular talk of last nights wanking activities, Shep's 21 times in 7 days effort, Abid being entranced by his own 'massive' biceps and Davidov's regular stories regarding him going out. Features of these legendary stories included talk of '120 km per hour', beer bottles flying past his head, getting smashed, fights, poles getting slammed in to cars, his mate pulling out a knife and of course sluts. It is possible I may have missed a few other aspects. Another highlight was my roid rage over Leo insulting my last name. The whole class wanted me to bash the kid senseless so I told everyone I was going to KO him in the seven minute break before class started. The plan was for me to walk in and crack him straight up with one solid blow. Howver as I walked in he was sitting on a desk innocently. Despite the urgings I resisted hurting him until I finally exploded. At that same precise moment Landsberger walked into the room. Ah well, plan ruined. Simple as that.

 

- Jerome's fight with a random Abo junkie at Carlton. I attended after running from my orthodontist at Hurstville all the way to Carlton Park. I had the choice of studying or watching a fight and chose the later. There were random junkies from Dylan's gang walking around the park and I was slightly intimidated even though I would have ripped any of them in a one on one fight. Seriously, 80% of the kids down there were smoking. I was one of the few who resisted. Others included Adam Hraiki, a few curris and my brother. The fight was dead set excellent. Both Jerome and the junkie were lacking fitness from smoking, yet this still didn't prevent a wild and eventful fight. Things that happened included Jerome punching junkie in the head when he was on the ground, Jerome kneeing junkie in the gut several times, Jerome tackling junkie to the ground league still and junkie going into a drug frenzy and  unleashing a kung fu kick to Jerome's ribs even though we told him no kicking. The punches were also of a high quality. As usual, the council workers tending to the gardening around the park took some 'well earned time off' to watch proceedings. It certainly was a solid lunchbreak for them. Jerome dominated, busting the Abo junkies eyebrow wide open. However, as the junkie was backpedalling towards the end of the fight he landed the most violent and ferocious punch I have ever seen in my life to Jerome's jaw. The result was some nasty swelling. Jerome battled on courageously with his brawling style and my respect for him as a fighter grew (not as a person, seriously, who accepts random challenges from Abos?) . I even had to break it up at one stage as the two guys went at it with hammer and tongs. Seriously, all you guys need to have a look at the two part video on my computer to see some great action.

 

- My academic renaissance in term four :-D

 

- Trivia night. JOKES! It was fucking shit.

 

Now I'm off to the sun and surf of the Gold Coast. I have packed my two English novels, maths textbooks, my mobile, my board and a little something to help with my guns lol. There will be no 'Babe of the Day' in this entry as I am in a rush.

 

2007 is going to be a big year. Getting a high UAI will open plenty of doors for me, however it is not the be all and end all. It is all about choice and ambition. Someone could be happy to simply marry a nice girl, have a family and lead a happy and simple existence. Others may have higher aspirations. Personally, I have my own high goals for the HSC and life in general. Hopefully 2007 will help set me on the right path. You know, you just have to follow your heart and chase what you want relentlessly. Dare to dream, fuck the critics. Look at Glenn McGrath. If he gave up when he was 16 where would be now? In a trade, thats where. Whatever you want, you can get it. You just need to work for it and the results will come no matter how bleak the situation looks. Anything is possible because God is not there to create obstacles to inhibit progress, he is there to test you. To see if you are strong enough, and if you are you will get what you want and achieve happiness in your life. Don't give up, hold onto your visions, work hard and everything will work out beautifully whether it be with school, sport, work or even the girl of your dreams.  

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Holidays! Psyche up boys and girls! Term 4 is over and Christmas beckons. It's been an eventful term and my mind was on schoolwork for the majority of the term. On a personal note, I am reasonably content with my academic performance of late. Nevertheless, I need to keep studying and improving in the holidays so I can get ahead, rip the HSC and make my parents proud :-)

 

I was thinking about publishing my results here, but I think I'm too cool for that. Ah fuck it, I'm not cool so here goes.... a detailed breakdown.

 

 

- Economics: 97%

 

- Maths: 84%

 

- Business Studies: 85%

 

- Modern History: ?

 

- English: ?

 

 

- Extension History Von Ranke Task: 90%

 

- Economics Group Assignment: 90%

 

- Extension English 19th Century Overview: 100%

 

- Business Studies Questions: 100%

 

- Extension English Mini-Assignments: 96%

 

- English 'Ivory Trail': 80%

 

- English 'Lime Tree Bower': 87%

 

- English 'Road Not Taken': 100%

 

- English 'Frost At Midnight': 87%

 

Fuck that is poor blogging! A sincere sorry to everyone who had to read through that complete load of shit. Now let me get back to my usual stories and page long tirades promoting myself.

 

Well what has been happening lately? School finished, had a few days at home to plan out what I'm going to do in the holidays. I didn't get further than sit in front of the computer and go to Hurstville. After my exams finished I did jack shit all day, basically watched James Bond with a few guys from Tech. It was a top movie, but very very long. I didn't enjoy the frequent number of times James Bond got shirtless. It was just weird, like the producer was secretly jacking off during the filming. However, on a positive note I must say the film flowed very nicely and the new blonde Bond certainly lived up to expectations.

 

After countless hours on MSN, I arranged to meet Shep. We decided to go to Miranda. It was in this sexual paradise that we encountered plenty of 'excellent quality'. Both of us enjoyed it greatly, as the sight of the Hurstville rabble is not particularly stimulating. We talked about our families, study, people from school, chicks and our respective problems. I felt greatly relaxed by the end of ths great discussion. We went into the newsagents and read several rugby league magazines and skimmed through a few well endowed ladies in Ralph and FHM. Then it was to the movies where we watched the one and only 'Borat'. Fuck I loved this movie. Random quotes like 'taste my arsehole' and 'the only thing that kept me going was the thought of making a love explosion on her stomach' combined to make it both hilarious and grossly intriguing at the same time.

 

The next day we went out again to the city. It was quite enjoyable as we got off at Circular Quay and enjoyed the majestic views of the Harbour Bridge and the Opera House. Then we walked through the Botanical Gardens. They were huge and my legs tired heaps quick walking through. There were a million bats in the trees. If you threw a rock in the canopy above us a thousand of the fuckers would have screeched down and sucked you up like Brianna's finishing move. We then got lost again.... visited a few more shops and a few hot santa girls gave me a chocolate. I also picked up every freebie advertisment possible. Why? Because I dead set fucking felt like it. We then proceeded to go to Galaxy World. It is here that things really heated up. As we walked in there were a million asians surrounding us. It was like a scene from 'Godzilla', there seemed to be millions of them and they all seemed alike. My dad warned me on the perils of this 'gangster wonderland' many times, however I was not erred from my task of playing games.

 

Instantly we encountered many asian techies, and Shep and I got straight into playing Extreme Hunting 2. It was the best game even though I was a complete n00b. I got schooled in all aspects..... hell, even when I shot something two times in the head the bugger never seemed to drop. Finally towards the end I started to raise the bar and began to match the excellent eye of Shep. It was heaps fun. However, we needed a break before we went square eyed. We went downstairs where some asians were playing Dance Dance Revolution or DDR. This game is dead set crazy and I hate it. This asian was going so hard he was sweating profusely from the face and his scores were all reading 'perfect' as Shep and I watched in awe and disgust at his skill. There was a mini-crowd watching him go and he seemed to be moving almost abnormally fast. I thought this quiet girl in red standing behind him was his coach or something. It was just dead-set crazy. Apparently Curly likes DDR. Lame one.... :-)

 

What else? Ah yes. I've gone back to swimming to regain my high levels of fitness a bit in the holidays. My coach remarked that I had 'built up' a bit in the off season. I'm suprised he didn't mention the size of my forearms, as the only cardio I have done until lately has been in front of the computer screen. The training gets me so whacked I barely have strength to bat. Note the use of the word 'barely'.

 

Also, I got my first ever best and fairest for the school. Yep, Open A's Touch. Reecived it due to 'moments of individual brilliance' as Gowan put it. Now, if anyone ever ventures back to Tech when we are done with school (which I doubt because it is a pretty shit school) look up at the boards and look at the name in gold writing: John Vallis. Anyways, thanks to Gowan and the wogs for voting for me.

 

Also, Elena still won't have anything to do with me which makes me pretty pissed. She still neglects the man himself from getting into any contact with her whatsoever. Ah well, I'm considering deleting her email and number from my phone. I think it would be best. What does everyone else say?

 

Anyways thats my rant. Sorry about the long wait in between blogs. MERRY CHRISTMAS TO EVERYONE! HAVE A SAFE AND ENJOYABLE HOLIDAYs!

 

Take care,

 

John Vallis

 

EDIT:

 

My question on Elena no longer needs to be answered. After yet another three way convo with Shep and Elena I looked at myself introvertly and answered it honestly.

 

The last text message I ever typed to my Year 10 formal date read: Congratulations. you have contributed to a pivotal moment in my life. I'm getting rid of all evidence of you and your existence. If you want me later in life you know where to find me. Your going to regret this WHEN I hit the big time and become famous :-). Good luck, wish you the best and hope you have a fulfilling and happy life. Maybe our paths will cross after school but I don't need you. I have no regrets at all. Your not worthy of me. Thanks for the memories and friendship. Bye.

 

And to Karima: What I wrote to Elena, same to you. Your gone. Bye.

 

I'm glad I've pissed that shit off once and for all :-)

 

NEW SEGMENT:

 

 

 

Stephanie Heinrich (born November 13 1979) is an American model and actress. Born in Cincinnati, and a graduate of Turpin High School, she is best known as being Playboy's first Cyber Girl of the Week as well as the first Cyber Girl of the Month.